Sunday, March 7, 2010

82nd Academy Awards Commentary

5:30 on the dot* We open with Best Actor & Actress Nominees. they're presented to us and then walk off the stage. that seemed totally unnecessary. but who cares?! coz.....

5:31 OMG its NPH!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH surprise musical number just made my day!!

5:34 Our hosts finally arrive via sky lift. They're a little awkward, a little slow on the punchlines, but completely endearing and successful.

5:37 Is it me or does Vera Farmiga look like she could pass for a vampire??

5:44 Penelope Cruz presents the first award, Best Supporting Actor. Its going to Christoph Waltz for Inglorious Basterds. Everyone knows this.

5:50 Ryan Reynolds. Mmmm.. Thank u, producers. He presents Best Picture Nominee #1, The Blind Side. I tear just watching clips of this movie. Total tearjerker.

5:55 Cameron Diaz (go LB Poly!) and Steve Carell present Best Animated Feature. This better go to UP. If uve never seen it, Go see it. the first part will have u crying like a baby!!! ...and sure enough, UP wins!!!!!

6:00 I like how all the winners are keeping their speeches short. oh no.... here comes Miley Cyrus. Joined by Amanda Seyfried they present Best Original Song. My bet is on Crazy Heart. And so far i'm 3 for 3 ppl!

6:05 Chris Pine...yummy. Thanks again, producers. He presents Best Picture Nominee #2, District 9.

6:11 Robert Downey Jr. and Tina Fey.... RDJ is so cute wearing sneakers! I dunno about that bow and glasses though. Best Original Screenplay.... I want UP to win, but it won't. It's got The Hurt Locker written all over it. And.... I'm 4 for 4!

6:17 Molly Ringwald and Matthew Broderick, later joined by Judd Nelson, Macaulay Culkin, and Duckie present a heartfelt montage about John Hughes. Sixteen Candles, i love u forever.

6:23 Samuel L Jackson presents Best Picture Nominee #3 Up. Oh gosh, my tears from the John Hughes tribute aren't dry yet and they start showing clips from this heartbreaking animated movie!

6:27 Carey Mulligan and Zoe Saldana present Best Short Film & Best Documentary Short. I know nothing about these categories so i'll say that Carey is pixie cute and Zoe's top glistens beautifully-- until the camera pans out and there's some purple shit attached to her dress. What is that? Ube? (Taro? for u non-filipinos) Logorama & Music by Prudence wins respectively. Good for them.

6:34 Who is this loud lady in a purple blanket speaking annoyingly at the viewers. Poor dude who accepted with her didn't get a word in. AND, they're the first people to be Oscar-music ousted offstage.

6:35 Omg... Carey and Zoe are still presenting???

6:37 Ben Stiller presents as a Na'vi and thank god for his timing. I'm sure people were starting to change the channel. He's presenting Best Make-Up and Avatar isn't even nominated! LOL!!!
Star Trek wins! Geeks still shout out in glee.

6:43 Jeff Bridges presents Best Picture Nominee #4 A Serious Man. Never seen a preview for this movie and I'm confused. Why was this nominated?!

6:47 Jake Gyllenhal and Rachel McAdams (two awesomely good-looking people) present Best Adapted Screenplay. This is a hard one. I could see any film winning. And the award goes to.... Precious: Based on the novel Push by Sapphire. Well, good thing it went to the movie that cites its literary basis EVERY time it's mentioned in the media.

6:52 Queen Latifah looks so elegant. She shoulda got an Oscar for Set it Off. She was crazy lesbo gangsta bank robber in that movie!

6:55 Robin Williams presents Best Supporting Actress. Let's not kid ourselves. This Oscar is going to Monique. Her character still scares me. I'm afraid pots will start flying at my head if she's around.

7:00 Monique thanks the Academy for "letting it be about the performance and not politics." Heh. Let's see who wins Best Picture first, hon.

7:01 Colin Firth presents Best Picture Nominee #5 An Education. How old is Carey Mulligan?

7:05 Sigourney Weaver presents the award for Best Art Direction. I don't see this going to anyone but Avatar. Yep, I'm right.

7:09 Tom Ford and Sarah Jessica Parker - where movies meet fashion. They present Best Costume Design. My vote is for Young Victoria or Coco Before Chanel. Winner is Sandy Powell for Young Victoria. She's won this award twice before.

7:11 Charlize Theron presents Best Picture Nominee #6 Precious: Based on a novel Push by Sapphire. This movie is quite disturbing before it is inspiring IMO. I could not watch it again and yet, I recommend others to see it.

7:17 Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin do a parody of Paranormal Activity and then the real horror comes out...

7:18 Taylor Lautner comes out with ::gag:: Kristen Stewart. Scary indeed.

7:19 Horror montage begins with Jaws. FUCK. Here comes Freddy. Psycho... The Shining.... Oh hell no... I hate that Chucky kid. This is WHY i DO NOT watch scary movies.

7:22 Anna Kendrick and Zac Efron present Best Sound Editing with a little help from Morgan Freeman. The Hurt Locker wins. Best Sound Mixing goes to them as well.

7:28 Elizabeth Banks gives some recognition to the Sci-Tech winners. And sadly, no one really cares or knows what she's talking about.

7:29 John Travolta presents Best Picture Nominee #7 Inglourious Basterds which really was such a great fun film. I still laugh at Brad Pitt's "Bon-zhure-no"

7:34 Sandra Bullock presents Best Cinematography. Here's our best clue as to how this night goes. Avatar wins! The Na'vi had something to do with it.

7:37 Demi Moore looks pretty good. I'm sure somewhere Perez Hilton is talking shit.

7:38 James Taylor sings "In My Life" to honor those that have passed. Patrick Swayze, David Carradine, Brittany Murphy, Natasha Richardson-- i'll miss u guys the most.

7:45 J Lo and Sam Worthington present Best Original Score. The orchestra performs while dancers take the stage. I dont know how I feel about this. I think I'd rather just hear the music. Either way, the award is going to Michael Giacchino for UP. It just HAS to. If not, he was ROBBED.

7:52 Thank you to TPTB bc Michael Giacchino's score for UP was just perfect. He deserved that award.

7:54 Gerard Butler and Bradley Cooper present Best Visual Effects. Avatar wins. They're cleaning up on the Effects side.

7:56 Jason Bateman presents Best Picture Nominee #8 Up In The Air. This is my personal favorite. (next to Up of course).

8:01 We're now down to the Best Documentary Movie nominations. These are the movies that terrify me. The winner is The Cove. Yes, let's save the dolphins!! Hey, that's Minkowski from Lost! Dude that died of time travelling nosebleeds on Lost.

8:05 Tyler Perry presents Best Film Editing. The Hurt Locker wins. It really is a battle between Hurt Locker and Avatar. James Cameron must be shaking in his Na'vi boots.

8:08 Keanu Reeves presents The Hurt Locker, Best Picture Nominee #9. Not a fan of war movies but it seems I'm gonna have to watch this film. Especially if it beats the almighty Avatar.

8:14 Pedro and Quentin present Best Foreign Language Film. It goes to The Secret in their Eyes, Argentina.

8:18 Kathy Bates presents Avatar, Best Picture Nominee #10. Now THAT is a strange pairing.

6:24 Michelle Pheiffer presents Jeff Bridges, Vera Farmiga presents George Clooney, Julianne Moore presents Colin Firth, Tim Robbins presents Morgan Freeman, and Colin Farrell presents Jeremy Renner. Its cute hearing these stories but let's just hear who wins already!!!!

8:31 .... Jeff Bridges wins Best Actor in a Leading Role! Surprised? Not at all!

8:39 It's time for Best Actress in a Leading Role. Let's see who's presenting who.... Ew, I see Oprah up there.

8:40 Forest Whitaker presents Sandra Bullock. Could this mean she's a shoe-in?? Forest is pretty high on the totem pole.

8:41 Some British guy I don't know presents Helen Mirren. She's sooo not winning.

8:43 Peter Sarsgaard presents Carey Mulligan. Another Brit, another nominee--not winner.

8:44 Oprah presents Gabouray Sidibe of Precious.

8:45 Stanley Tucci presents Meryl Streep. God, to work with her would be divine.

8:47 Sean Penn gives the award for Best Actress in a Lead Role to..... Sandra Bullock!!! She didnt prepare a speech. I'm already crying and she hasnt gotten up there.

8:52 ::sniff::sniff:: i heart Sandra Bullock.

8:53 Babs! (Barbra Streisand) is presenting Best Director. Here it is. Battle between Kathryn and James....Dun dun dun!!!

8:55 Kathryn Bigelow WINS!!!! How does it feel, James?!?!!?!?

8:58 Tom Hanks runs out there and wastes no time. BEST PICTURE goes to The HURT LOCKER!!!! Smackdown Avatar. SMACKDOWN.

Overall, it was a WAY BETTER show than last years. Alec and Steve were great. And someone owes me money because I knew the Academy wouldnt give it to Avatar. I'm sure James Cameron is somewhere trying to figure out how u say "WTF" in Na'vi?? LOL....

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